Deep Fried Madness

It's no secret that for many Americans foods can be improved simply by slapping a coating of breading on it and then dipping the food item in the deep fryer. If breading it isn't an option, creating a batter akin to a pancake batter and pre-dipping the food in that before the hot oil bath will usually do.

I thought it was interesting when I was at the local carnivals and would see just plain batter fried (doughnuts, funnel cakes). Then I was exposed to the next level of yummy with Deep Fried Oreos (three for five bucks! What a deal!). We even figured out how to make them at home.

I found sites on the Internet that listed different fried food items...and apparently if it can be forced into a fryer, it can be improved. I was shocked. Check these out, for example...I mean, Coke? It seems that if you can imagine frying it, it can be fried.

For some reason my wife thinks fried foods are unhealthy. I haven't asked the nutritionist about fried foods and bariatric surgery. I'm thinking maybe deep friend ham isn't really all that bad for you, is it?

Now I thought that usually something as plain and "unhealthy" as fried Oreos is reserved for people with simple tastes...carnival tastes. Y'know, the crowd that is happy with shopping at the mall or eating at McDonalds.

My wife and I went to Olive Garden yesterday while out in town picking up a web-submitted job to FedEx Kinkos (or whatever they're named now). Read this description of one of their new limited time food items: "Parmesan-breaded lasagna pieces, fried and served over alfredo sauce, topped with parmesan cheese and marinara sauce." It's called "Lasagna Fritta."

While looking at the menu together, my wife said, "It's deep fried lasagna."

"You mean like deep fried Oreos?"

"Yup."

Um...okay. Olive Garden isn't exactly like the restaurants where you spend seventy dollars for an entree, but it's definitely a step or two above McDonald's (or Panera Bread, for that matter, in price for a meal).

This Lasagna Fritta is a limited time appetizer offer. Fortunately, Olive Garden is one of the major chains that prints their nutrition info on their website, including for limited time offers (Applebee's SUCKS in this regard, but that's a rant for another day.)

Brace yourself. The appetizer has 1030 calories, 63 grams fat (24 grams saturated), 1780 mg of sodium, 77 grams carbohydrates but 9 grams fiber.

That's the appetizer. So I guess it's not so bad if you split it among a family of five. I think there's six bite-sized chunks of lasagna there.

I think it's a sign when foods that are considered standard fare for the unwashed masses become mainstream enough that they can be dressed up with such flowery language in a restaurant that charges ten bucks or more for an appetizer dish. Before the surgery I would tell myself that if other people were eating something, it must not be too bad...normals are eating it. How bad can it be?

That sign is saying that unhealthy is mainstream. We can't rely on mainstream menus and restaurant chains to be giving us guidance as much as they're giving us what they think we want to buy...and we want the bad stuff. So now it's socially acceptable to offer the things that make us pigs. Buffets may as well be offering troughs instead of bars to fill our plates.

Scary.